Left to right: Recently deceased Golden Girls Rue McClanahan, Dennis Hopper, Gary Coleman and Slipknot bassist Masky McGee, who committed suicide.

It’s been a rough week on us all as my Celebrity Wristwatch Curse continues. First, I got this Michael Jackson watch as a gift, and now my wife’s Golden Girl watch has claimed its next victim. It’s just like the Monkey’s Paw, but for $20 plastic wristwatches. So that’s the bad news. The good news is, I’ve bought ever single Rod Blagojevich watch and I plan on wearing them up both arms as long as it takes.

Remember, the Golden Girls airs at 6 and 6:30 on WE Network, 11 and 11:30 EST on Hallmark, and 11 and 11:30 on WE again. Also, I’ll see you on the Hallmark Channel forums (yes, they have a thriving message board community! Thank you for asking!)

In memorial, one last time with passion….let’s return to a magical place, sugah. Rue has already been to Cat Mountain, so heaven holds no surprises for her.

Shown: an excuse to show this graphic again.

Remember when I interviewed Rivers Cuomo last year and reported he’s not that big a fan of Guitar Hero? Here’s the excerpt:

WARD: On a scale of 1-10, how bad could I kick your ass at Weezer’s “My Name is Jonas” on Guitar Hero III?

RIVERS:
[laughs] Probably a 10, because I don’t know how to play it! I’ve never played it. I don’t get those games at all. I mean, I haven’t tried them. But they must be fun because people love them. But, to me, it seems like if you’re going to put that much effort into playing something, you should just play a real instrument. [laughs]

Predictably, the gaming community had plenty of strong opinions about that.

Well, if you’re wondering if Rivers Cuomo wants you to forget about that (he wants you to). This is as close to what Sarah Palin calls “Gotcha Journalism” as I’m gonna get here, folks.

So what made Rivers change his mind? The chance to spend a day in his boxers around Taylor Swift? No…no…that definitely couldn’t be it.

And not only that, but Rivers is “rocking out.” I mean, “his footage is amazing.” I don’t know about you, but I’m “losing my mind I’m so excited about it.” Well, according to Taylor Swift (who also appears alongside Renee Zellweger in “Squinty Blonde Hero” next fall).

Here’s a behind-the-scenes look at the commercial (but why?), with Rivers noticeably absent from the string of forced, on-message PR interviews. Pete Wentz, for instance, really goes out of his way to imagine what it’s “really” going to look like because it just seems “so insane.” Uh-huh. In his defense, if I was shooting this commercial I’d wake and bake in the Activision green room as well.

So, what’s the deal here? Why would Rivers get in his boxers and take Guitar playing directions from THIS douchebag all morning? Or appear in New York City for the game’s enormous launch party? Maybe it’s because Raditude  only sold 66,000 copies in its first week (if you still pay attention to the dinosaur of thought that is “CD Sales=success”)? Or maybe Rivers just chilled out and decided, “you know what? I get it. It’s just a game. It’s fun. Playing Guitar Hero and playing actual guitar are mutually exclusive, and can both be enjoyed, or not enjoyed, in equal measure.”

Or maybe the money was really, really good. Like, DAMN…maybe it was really good money. You didn’t really think that “Beverly Hills” song was tongue in cheek, did you?

Shown: “Do it like this! See? Just like this! Like a real guitar, but not! Ok…ACTION!”